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What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Last Updated: 27.06.2025 05:40

What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

TEXT:

Why did the Soviet Jews hate the Soviet Union?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Make Nazis afraid again!

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Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why do Indian guys love Russian girls?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Is it normal to hate my dog, but feel too guilty to get rid of him?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

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Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

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¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

What was your best unexpected reunion with your childhood best friend?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

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Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!